Adam came first, but men always do

Sexual innuendo implied.


I grew up Lutheran and had the Bible pounded into my head for a majority of my childhood. In high school, I wavered here and there about my beliefs, but I always came back to them. However, in college, I became more interested in politics, and since the November 2004 Presidential election was near the beginning of my freshman year in college, religion was a hot topic. The November 2004 election is actually what influenced me to no longer consider myself a Christian. Why, you ask? Well, there's this concept of separation of church and State that our country does not abide by, and George W. Bush abused that to the fullest.

Don't get me wrong... I do not immediately judge or dislike someone based on their beliefs. However, I do dislike when people misquote the Bible and manipulate the text to use to their advantage. People used to use the Bible as an excuse for slavery. The Bible is constantly used as reference against gay marriage today, and the Bible has always been extremely oppressive to women. Let's not forget all of the violence over religion, coined "crusades."

Keep in mind... the Bible was written by, edited by, and mistranslated by MEN, and typically men in power. Not to mention it was written a couple thousand years ago, and times have changed. King David had a man killed because that man's wife was David's mistress. Though he sinned, I don't think anyone has their doubts about whether he was forgiven and went to heaven. Yet consensual sodomy is still illegal in many places today, and many people think being gay means going to hell. People don't CHOOSE to be gay, and you mean to tell me they are punishable by God for who they are?

I am not really religious anymore... I consider myself Unitarian Universalist, leaning towards Buddhism, but I can't deny I still believe in Jesus. I just don't believe a majority of the Bible. Every religion sounds like a book a fairy tales to me, and most have similar morals to their story. I actually think Jesus was liberal, and he was also a radical, if you really consider his teachings and actions. Anything that Jesus might have frowned upon according to the 2,000 year old Bible might hold a different opinion for Jesus today.

I have always had a couple huge issues with even the beginning of the Bible. The punishment for Original Sin was for all women to experience horrible pain during childbirth and for men to work for a living. Now women do both, and men still don't pop out babies. It is quite upsetting to me. Also, if Noah and his family and his sons' wives were the only survivors of the great flood, how do you explain all the different races in the world? Anytime I ask that, people make up their own logic that has no backup from the Bible.

What is a Hate Crime?

Let me make something clear... A hate crime is not solely "white man kills black man." A hate crime is defined as: "Any of various crimes (as assault or defacement of property) when motivated by hostility to the victim as a member of a group (as one based on color, creed, gender, or sexual orientation)." There ARE different types of crime, such as hate, passion, premeditated, desperation, etc. So, no, not every crime is hateful (particularly to a whole group of people). When a crime is committed solely because of hate towards a group, it gives a reason for that whole community to fear for their lives and safety. I think we should consider EDUCATING those that commit hate crimes, not just jailing them, but it is sad everyone doesn't understand why this bill is necessary.

This is one great organization that does work towards educating the antagonists of hate crimes:
http://www.southasiannetwork.org/Programs.htm

I will also add, there will ALWAYS be some lack of understanding by those who do not fall within a group that is often stigmatized by main society. IF we didn't have a problem with racism, homophobia, etc., we wouldn't even NEED labels. I give some people credit for gaining a phenomenal understanding of groups they do not necessarily identify with and the issues they face, but FEW people bother to do so, and few people could understand what it is like unless you have personal experience.

Safe Sex 101

I always found it strange that the first question many men ask women before they sleep with them is, "How many men have you had sex with?" See, it's weird, because number of partners isn't entirely reflective of their sexual health. You can have sex with one person only, and contract 3 STIs from that one person. Or, you could have had sex with 20 people, and not have contracted one single disease or infection. The BETTER question would be, "Have you been tested recently?"

Plus, I have known people afraid to get tested because they think they will test positive for something. If you don't know about it, that doesn't mean you magically don't have anything. It is important to get tested in between every partner, or, if you have been cheated on, then sometimes while you're still with the same partner (though I advise you dump them...).

Did you know that they have done studies that show a majority of men don't even know how to put a condom on correctly? Sad, isn't it? There are certain STIs that you aren't necessarily protected from with condom use too, such as HPV. HPV can be contract from the skin around the privates, and sometimes there are no visible signs that someone has it. Unfortunately, it is even more dangerous for women since we can contract cervical cancer.

Anyway, moral of the story is, get tested regularly and be sure that your partner does as well.

Death and Dying

I remember when I was in college, all of my premed friends were taking the class "Death and Dying," and I just thought it sounded dreadful and like the most unpleasant class in the world. However, maybe I could have benefited from a class that teaches you more about loss and the aftermath of losing a loved one.

My sister passed away about 6 months ago, and I am still hurting from that. Now my grandmother is in the hospital with lung cancer, and the outlook isn't great. Maybe I was spoiled with barely experiencing deaths of anyone I knew for too long, but now I am losing two family members within half a year. It's amazing the pain that loss of loved ones leaves behind. I fear that my family will never be the same and will struggle to remain strong through these times, but I hope we can keep it together, cause we have enough dysfunction without the tragedies. In fact, the bigger tragedy might just be the pain left behind.

Lo and behold, I am trying to remain optimistic and hopeful, but sometimes, when it rains, it really f!@#ing pours. Please keep my family in your prayers, if you read this (and if you pray).

The Sexual Innuendo

You know what I love? When people constantly spew out statements that can be taken in naughty ways.

I went out to dinner with two of my best friends tonight, and I could not stop giggling due to one of my friends repeatedly saying things that could be taken the wrong way. Such as, "Yeah, it hit the spot," in an unintentionally seductive manner. Or, "That salad looks super moist," with the reply, "Yeah, I like it moist." Or, "Let me help you with that..." also in a seductive voice, and helping someone jiggle a takeaway cup in a very awkward push and pull movement. Last, but not least, from the server: "Sorry, I couldn't put the [sour] cream all on one bill, so I had to put it all on yours," with the reply, "It's ok, I'll give more for the tip."

I don't know... somehow the 3 of us were able to take these statements all in the naughtiest way possible. Perverts, or just too many sexual innuendos that we have no choice to think naughty?

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Completely random thought: I was challenging my brother on why there is a KFC buffet in Indiana, because unlimited fried chicken sounds like a bad idea. He explained there were other things there, like mac and cheese and COLESLAW, and it was somehow hilarious, because I have never heard someone sound so angry while saying the word COLESLAW. My brother tends to put emphasis on weird words... Therefore, the quote of the day arose, "You know what pisses me off?!?! COLESLAW!!!"

Sex Ed 101

I personally think sex education is extraordinarily important and underrated. I think that, from a very young age, children must at least be taught what is a "good touch" or a "bad touch," because child molestation is a huge problem and it is much more common than most people think.

Courtesy of nowpublic.com:

The statistics say that one out of every three to four girls has been sexually assaulted by the age of 18. One boy out of every six will be abused by the age of 18.

Also, many children who are molested never admit to it because their life is threatened or they think it is their fault, or do not realize it is not normal. Victims of child molest often suffer from many mental illnesses throughout their lifetime, from depression to a personality disorder.

Perhaps there would be less teenage pregnancy if there were more proper sex education as well. For instance, there are MANY children/teenagers who start having sex before they are even given a sex ed intro course. Likewise, many of these youths who have sex early on do not understand that pulling out does not guarantee no baby! Most people (youths and adults) are unaware that you can still catch certain STIs even while using a condom. To top it off, many adult men do not even know how to put a condom on properly (sad, I know, but true).

A better understanding of the crossroads of homosexuality, transgender, transsexual, etc, would probably help as well, since there are so many ignorant and prejudice people in this world that turn to violence and hate. I happen to think that those men who act extremely homophobic are actually closeted homosexuals themselves. For example, those men that love UFC cause it's so masculine, when, to me, it really looks like two grown men dry humping.

It's ironic that the same people who argue against abortion and for abstinence are the same people arguing against sex education. I think proper sex education would lead to a decreased number of abortions, and hopefully those that didn't remain abstinent would at least practice safe sex.

I have no doubt in my mind that better sex education would NOT lead to more promiscuity, but would lead to wiser sexual choices by our youths, and perhaps adults as well.

The Clinically Depressed

I have so many varied thoughts on clinical depression. I have no idea whether I am pro-meds or anti-meds, because I understand that sometimes the side effects of antidepressants can cause just as many problems, such as suicidal ideations. Isn't it ironic to treat yourself with medications for depression that might lead to different kinds of depression?

But at the same time, I hate to see how many people give up on life and don't try anything productive. Would I rather my alcoholic loved ones pop antidepressants or do their typical drinking themselves stupid?

I have lost a loved one to suicide, and I wish everyday that she had seeked help. I think I sooner would have wanted her to seek help from therapy (or even me) than drugs though. I fully believe that depression is a huge problem... Those with depression or suicidal thoughts are not freaks; they are mentally ill, and many of them have been seriously traumatized.

However, I lean towards the thought that the US's tendency to constantly overmedicate just leads to the mentally ill not learning how to properly cope. Also, it seems too many people fail to recognize that physical health also reflects mental health. Quite literally, you are what you eat. If you eat healthy, your mind will be healthier as well.

This post is scattered, but I just must say, maintain a healthy life, and if you have problems, seek help!

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. (Or multiple problems)

Balloon Heaven

I decided to start a blog to vent about my opinions, passions, and pointless, random stories rather than forcing everyone to listen to them.

Why did I choose the name balloon heaven? Well, because if I were in a band, that would be the name of my band. Remember when you were a kid and held a balloon in your hand and it was the coolest thing in the world? And then, suddenly tragedy struck, and your balloon slipped out of your grip and it was lost forever in the sky above, and it was the saddest thing you could imagine. Well, as a partial optimist, I want to believe there is such a thing as a balloon heaven to put little kids' hearts at ease.

To begin, I am a feminist, I'm very liberal, I'm not very religiously affiliated, I'm of mixed racial decent, and I am a residential counselor for at-risk children. Therefore, most of my blogging will probably involve one of these topics, though maybe occasionally a pointless, random story will be included. Also, I am a Yelp.com junkie, though currently lacking internet at home, so blogging (and Yelp reviews) will be done at the same time I drink coffee at Intelligentsia.